Monday, February 26, 2007

79th Academy Awards Fashion Recap

My roommates and I hosted an impromptu Oscar party last night. Thinking the awards ceremony began at 7 and the pre-show started at 6, I crawled out of bed at 10 till 7 to a living room full of friends. (Yep, After watching Kentucky lose to Vanderbilt for the 5th time in a row- I can't even talk about it- at Jonathan's with Lana, I needed a nap before the Oscars. Yes, That sex-with-an-alligator will get you every time!) Rhonda, Joe, Amy, Sarah, Lana, Brad, and new friends from church Kevin & Jeff all made an appearance, as well as me, Nat, and Em playing the hostesses with the mostestess. The guys got a kick out of our constant commentary as the celebrities popped up on the screen. Some critical, some complimentary, but we all know that next to the actual films being awarded, the fashion is the next important thing. I am uninspired at work today and will therefore devote as much time as I can to an accurate recap of the Oscars last night- the good, the bad, and the ugly!

Best Dressed

We all agreed that Nashville native Reece Witherspoon looked amazingly fresh in her flowingmidnight blue strapless gown, and shiny straight hair. Of course, she wasn't going to top her ballgown from last year, but as a presenter this year, she looked classy to the max.

Penelope Cruz nailed it with this apricot confection by Atelier Versace

Kate Winslet played up her porcelain skin with this mint green gown. She looked elegant and well-put-together. For a curvaceous woman, she always dresses herself well.

Some have chided Naomi Watts for this pale yellow number, but I'm a fan. It's not an expected color, and I think she comes off looking cutting edge and the opposite of red carpet cookie-cutter.

This devilish Prada girl made an impact on me in a gorgeous form fitting royal blue gown. It made her noticeable without stealing the spotlight, and made her stand out among the crowds in her first big Oscar appearance. Will we be seeing more of Miss Emily Blunt? We might is she keeps dressing like that!

Finally, the always-sheik and glamorous Cate Blanchett looked classy and
elegant. Again, there are naysayers out there who have criticized her choice (I've tried to stay away from reading media opinions until I can finish this blog) but I think the dress shows off her figure and commendable posture extremely well. It's eye-catching and sparkly without being flashy, and what color do you call that? No one can say for sure, so it becomes a topic of conversation! Smart lady.

Type Casting

Helen Mirren lived up to all the hype- not only did she win accolades for her performance in the Queen, but she looked like royalty in her glittering gown. I haven't seen the movie yet, but every interview I've seen of her, she comes off very gracious, and seems very honored to have been chosen to portray the Queen mum.

George Miller appears to be channelling a real-life version of the characters for his award-winning animated film, Happy Feet

Fashion Faux Pas

Ok Gweneth. It looks like somebody said, what the ugliest color we can put on Gwen? Puke-salmon? Gwen: "oh okay, this is definitely the best Oscar dress out there- I'll take it." Even if it were in another color I'm not sure it would be redeemable. The side-swept hair that she and Nicole were both sporting is a desperate attempt to me to be "different" and fails miserably. Don't tell me that's a style that laypeople will be copying in the fall. I can assure you, it's not. We love you Gwen, but this frock has flunked.

Anne Hathaway- what were you thinking? This dress was not the White choice for you. You were in film centering around fashion, were you not?

And Cameron, we know your recent break-up with JT could not have been easy, but we beg of you, come back from Futurama, Judy Jetson, come back to reality, the one where you're a beautiful woman, deserving to look pretty.

"Listen" Jennifer: "Love you I do" but tonight is your "One Night Only" and you sure were not our "Dreamgirl" in this gold lame' jacket. We had "Patience" and you did take off the offensive jacket once inside, and we are even more glad you declared that "I am changing" into the red slinky number you donned for the big Dreamgirls song and dance number. Aside from bosoms hanging out, this dress was more up your Diva alley. Now "It's all over" and you have an Academy Award out of the deal. We're so proud of you. All's well that ends well. The Dreams all looked heavenly in their red ensembles.

Again, Kirsten's stylist must have taken her cue from Gwen's gal, because it appears that they decided to go with the most blase' of hues for the most critical of fashion events. Kirsten's always been a quirky actress, and this dress fits that persona for sure. Either that, or maybe she's becoming friends with Bjork. Look out for the full swan get-up for next year's Oscars.

Meryl, Meryl, Meryl. You're not exactly the new kid on the block. You're no stranger to Hollywood, and in fact you were even nominated for the best actress award tonight. Granted, you and I both knew that there was no chance in Hades that you would win, but come on, at least don something a little more dressy so that we don't assume you think you're headed to your kid's parent-teacher conference!

I suppose negative press is still good press, because it gets people talking about you, but I'd like to know who the risk-taker was when they decided that this sackcloth would make a positive statement on the red-carpet. No one knows much about this smoky eyed seductress (I'm too lazy to even look her name up on imdb, but I know she played Sibella in last year's Kingdom of Heaven) but she sure isn't going to gain name-recognition in a frumpy beige dress (if it can even be called that) like this one.

The Jury's Still Out

There are things I like and things I don't about Nicole's fire-engine red dress. The color is attention-grabbing, but the color combined with china doll skin and make-up is perhaps a bit too harsh. The hair, I've already made reference to, but I was annoyed by it. And finally, what's up with the bow? I suppose it dresses up and otherwise-ordinary red dress, but from fashion royalty like her, I expected more.

I can't decide about this gown. The guys agreed that the horizontally-lined neckline is not flattering to her figure. And to me this dress is copying a previous red carpet event that did a much better job of channelling the Grecian Goddess. This one has the sparkles but isn't different enough from that other gown, and definitely doesn't top the other in style and grace. It's blah, just like J-Lo has been lately.

While it's true, the girl can sing (I'd pit her up against Mary J. Blige any day) I think maybe her mom is still making her outfits? It's borderline to me. I keep going back and forth to thinking it's hideous and then admiring her originality. I'm open to be swayed one way or the other.

The Ties Have it

Leo has sure grown up, and boy, does he clean up well! Here he is posing on the red carpet with fellow Blood Diamond cast mate Djimon Hounsou, who also looked quite handsome.

One of Britain's It-Boys, Clive Owen makes a statement in his head-to-toe black .

Here's two of my favorite Latino cutie-patooties Gael Garcia Bernal and Diego Luna smiling for the camera.

Finally, the Dreamgirls newcomer doll baby, Keith Robinson looks debonair in his black tux and silver tie.

I'm a big fan of all the men paring the ties with their tuxes. That said, Mark Walhburg sure can make a bow tie look hot!
WHEW!!! This has taken me all day to do... working with so many pictures is not an easy feat! I plan on getting around to part 2 where we talk about the actual awards show (can we say, Longest show EVER??!!) and the films that were honored, but for now, the fashion review is all you get. Discuss.


MamaB said...

A great fashion review of the Oscars--just another example of great writing for us instead of great writing for the masses.
Anyway--I think the red bow dress donned by Nicole was stunning and only someone with her looks can wear that and look amazing.
JLo--I did not like that dress on her and usually look forward to what she will wear--disappointment there.
Enough about the ladies---Leo definitely looked great and Markie Mark looked very debonair. Jack Nicholson's bald head was another story and sitting on the front row, we got to see plenty of him.
Great fashion show but the actual awards needed a little work.

emmysue said...

I only have one thing to say...Mark Wahlberg=YUMMY!

Mark Kelly Hall said...

Your career with Entertainment Tonight is a cinch. For what it's worth.

I didn't watch more than a few intermittent minutes of the show (and I haven't seen any of the films) but it looked like they were really trying to make it interesting. And not always succeeding. But at least they got out on time, right? Wait...

Now my take on your take:

"...But I think the dress shows off her figure and commendable posture extremely well."

Yes! Posture! Very commendable! I love a gal with great posture! (You're exactly right but I still find this funny).

"...I'd pit her up against Mary J. Blige any day." Gross. Oh, never mind, I see what you mean.

And never underestimate the impact a successful "parent-teacher conference" can have on an actor's career! (Good one!).

Here's one you missed: "Kirsten Dunst? Make that Kirsten DUNCE!" Too easy.

I think Cameron Diaz was going for the albino mermaid look. Or she was expecting bigger shoes.

By the way, who was that sissy black dude interviewing people on the red carpet? He kept forgetting what the microphone was for. He was the worst I've ever seen; he was like a character in an SNL sketch only not funny, just extremely awkward (and not humorously awkward like Napoleon Dynamite, just awkward).

On with real life...or a reasonable facsimile.