Wednesday, August 30, 2006

celebrity sighting

We all know I'm about as observant as a fishmonger- hmm- that reference doesn't quite work here does it? Well, okay- I'm not observant At ALL. While at UK I used to moan and gripe about how I'd never spot basketball players on campus. Other people would see them all the time and somehow I never would. Then one day while walking through the student center with a friend of mine she exclaimed, "hey, there went Jules Camara!" "Where?!" I hollared. "He just walked by us." The friend said. So I quickly spun around. How I managed to miss a 6'7" black guy in Blue UK warm-ups I'll never know!

All that to say, I think I am the only one who hasn't spotted Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban out and about in Nashville. It could very well be because I am oblivious and have missed a chance siting, however, last night the celebrity came to me. Are you ready for this? Eric Heatherly hit on me at Tootsie's. Not impressed? Yeah. Neither was I.

Here I was minding my own business, sitting next to Ari on a bar stool while Bart and his Devil Dogs laughed and reminisced, and Eric and his entourage of guys crowd up next to me at the bar. They are being obnoxious, and so when one of his friends yells to me, don't you know who that is? "That's Eric Heatherly- he had a number one hit!" My reply was, "yeah, I know who he is, and his one number one song was a remake of somebody else's song." Really, I'm not a total "Bench," but when a group of guys come over and invade my space and then expect me to be impressed with some B-list celebrity I'm not going to fall all over him! My favorite exchange with Eric was after he asked me where I was from. Nashville, I replied. "Well why are you sitting here like a tourist then?" Eyeing his long wavy hair, soul patch, necklace, and open collared print shirt, I replied without missing a beat, "well why do you look like you're on That 70's Show?" Soon thereafter I moved over to one of Bart's friends to get away from our wallflower while he pleaded with his eyes for me to rescue him from a creepy guy who looked suspciciously like a blond version of that guy in Happy Gilmore that wore the shirt Guns Don't Kill People. I Kill People. The kicker: Eric was drinking a Smirnoff Ice! What respectable guy drinks that?? (Ari had to point out to me what he was drinking- I never would have noticed a detail like this!)

Monday, August 28, 2006

I can see clearly now the frames are on

We're reading a book in my small group called Calm My Anxious Heart by Linda Dillow. I highly recommend it for any women out there seeking to find contentment in life from a Biblical standpoint. This week's chapter was entitled "A Faulty Focus." The author uses the example of her poor eyesight and how after having eye surgery she was able to focus and see more clearly; she was given a new vision. The chapter is about identifying your life purpose- what are living for, how do you ideally want to be living, and how are you going to get there?

Well the eyesight analogy really hit home for me. Most of you all know that I wear glasses. I've tried wearing contacts several times in my life, and for whatever reason, they don't work for me, so I'm supposed to wear my glasses all the time. However, I spend much of my day pulling them on and off my face because I hate to wear them. I hate how I look in them, I hate how I think I appear to others, and I hate being able to "see" their outline in my line of vision. So for most of my day I choose not to wear them, and as a result there are a lot of things I miss out on because I have chosen not to see them clearly with my glasses on.

All that is to say that the first thing in knowing what we want our focus to be (Christ), is that we have to want to change our curent focus (the world). We have to recognize that we're seeing things out of focus and take active steps to change that. Sometimes we know what that focus needs to be, and we even know how we need to get there, but we just choose to continue to see things blurry.

For me, that means that I know that it's dumb to not wear my glasses- I know that my reasons for not wanting to wear them should not outweigh my desire to be able to see things clearly around me. For some of us that means knowing what we were created to do, but not doing it. It can mean knowing how we are to live our lives as Believers but choosing to live under the blurry guidelines that the world has set in front of us instead.

Aside from challenging me to get over my disdain for my own spectacles, this chapter really challenged me to refocus my own life. What was I created to do, and how am I achieving that? Where do I see myself in 10 years at age 35, and where do I see myself at 80, and what do I need to change in my life now in order to get there? It was a good exercise for me to sit down and put these aspirations on paper and share them with my small group to hold me accountable.

Sunday, August 27, 2006

Family Tradition

Another weekend well spent in Bucktown, aka Cannelton, IN- the town where my mom’s family still resides. We went up there to help celebrate my aunt Lisa and Uncle jerry’s 30th wedding anniversary. After a frustrating slow Friday at work, Laura and I took off up I-65 with Caramel Light frappucnos in hand and a random mix of cds and songs on our ipods for our listening enjoyment. Mom and dad didn’t come up until the next morning because they had to stay in Brentwood and cheer on the 2005 State Football champ Ravenwood Raptors on to a 36-35 loss to BA on Friday night for the school’s home opener. It was the first time in my 25 years that I have been at my grandparent’s house without either of my parents there with me.

After visiting with Papa for a while and watching baseball on TV with him, Laura and I drove up to one of the plethora of watering holes located in this tiny town and met Lisa & Jerry, and cousin Ryan and his girlfriend Robin. Let’s just say that people don’t go to this particular bar for their drinks. I sipped on a whiskey sour for most of the night that if I didn’t know better would swear was made with straight sour mix and no whiskey, and it took Laura 4 times before she got a drink she could manage to stomach (the first she sent back because it had a gnat floating in it, the next she sipped, but ordered a third drink before she was done with that one because it was made with sour mix instead of tonic water, the third drink was made with flat tonic water, and finally, on her 4th attempt at ordering a beverage, she got a vodka and 7-up that was pretty much impossible to screw up, but by this time we were all ready to go home.)

Saturday was the big party day, so Laura, Robin, and I spent the first part of our day decorating the American Legion building down by the river in Cannelton for that night’s town shindig. It really was a town affair as well over a hundred people showed up to celebrate with Lisa & Jerry, eat mass amounts of fried chicken, sing karaoke, and drink 4 kegs of beer (that were floated before 11pm) plus several more cases of iced down canned beer, As Lisa so aptly put it, in the middle of a classic family karaoke rendition of Hank Williams Jr.’s Family Tradition, “The family that drinks together stays together.” If that is true, then our family will be staying together for a Long time!

Humorous Anecdotes of the evening include, but are not limited to:

*an old high school friend of one of my uncles confessed to him that he is in the Louisville mafia, and that he should “let him know if he ever needed anything taken care of”

*A 20-year-old kid proposing to my sister because he found out that she could cook And clean. After telling her that he would work, she said, “yes, but will you work Hard?”

*”She’s not MY Vina, she’s not YOUR Vina, she’s ARvina!”

*Robin, Laura, & I singing Baby Got Back without the words on the screen due to a faulty karaoke cd

*Watching mom and uncle Michael do the chicken dance

*Mom & Aunt Missy’s rendition of Goodbye Earl, but changing the name to Goodbye Mike, since they’re both married to Mikes

*My cousin Chris jumping out from behind a tree in an attempt to scare his brother, but finding out quickly that it was his next-door neighbor that he had never before met… so Chris made pleasantries and ended up giving the neighbor the entire bag of leftover fried chicken.

(A quick shout-out to all the family members who fit into the Silent Lurker category of reading the blog but are never brave enough to post comments!)

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Not Fair

Where have all the rednecks gone? Guess they don't go the Wilson County Fair on a Thursday night- it must be too far to drive from out in the country on a week night. Not too far for us though! The 8 of us- Emily, Natalie, Mary Anna, Sarah, Lisa, Mandy, Lana, and me met up after work tonight and drove out to the legendary Wilson County Fair. After posing for the perfect photo op in front of a display with several bales of hay (hey, that's what gaggles of girls do!) we entered into the fairgrounds.
First stop was checking out several of the animals on display. We saw mini-mules, cows, Buddy the ice cream churning horse, Llamas, and Alpacas. After snapping several pictures and saying "Tina, eat your FOOD" about a million times, we proceeded on our quest to find the pig races before it got dark. After hiking all the way across the fairgrounds, our mouths watering at the aroma of fried food at every turn, we found the races in time to see goats, pigs, ducks, and the grand finale- the Vietnamese pot belly pigs race. Natalie was crowned "Pig Queen" of the last race because pig #6, the pig she was selected out of the crowd to root for, won the race. She got a blue ribbon and everything! (Way to go, FR!) That'll do Pig Queen, that'll do.

Next stop: dinner. We fared well; we saw the Taco in a Bag stand again this year, but decided on other delectable delights for dinner. Some got corndogs, others got hamburgers. I opted for the regular hotdog and a big glass of sweet tea. I did manage to refrain from getting the french fries since I knew I would want something sweet later on in the evening. We scarfed down our fair food and it was off to the rides. I will skip to the next important part of the evening- snack time. Sure, the rides were fun- some were disappointing (Hello, can we say Tilt-a-whirl? Sucky music and no spinning!) but we all know that the whole reason people go to fairs are to eat fair food!

I was on a mission to find the one booth with the fried Oreos that we had passed earlier on in the night, which sounded like maybe one of the best food creations ever invented. I could have just gotten a funnel cake, but seeing the Oreos, I was intrigued, and no other food could satisfy this craving. I found the booth and stood in line, getting all the way up to the front, when I saw a sign that said Fried Oreos: 6 for $5. Well I didn't want 6 Oreos, and I certainly didn't want to pay $5 for them either, so I made the girl at the counter an offer.
"Do you have to get 6?" I asked her. "I only want 2. Can I just pay you 2 or 3 dollars for them?"
You'd have thought I just asked the girl what the square root of 47 was as she gave me this blank stare and then panicked. I had interrupted their perfect system apparently. So she turned to ask another lady in the booth with her-
"this girl only wants 2 fried oreos. Can we do that?"
The other lady looks in my direction, and says
"no, you have to get 6."
So I stared back at her and stood my ground.
"But I don't want 6 cookies I told her. I only want 2. Either you can make $3 or you can make nothing."
She, being a very bad business woman, and a champion for the growing obesity problem in America, also stood her ground, and she made nothing from me this night. I was both aggravated and pleased at this result- aggravated because I marched away empty-handed and still craving those dadgum fried Oreos, but pleased because I had made my point and stood up for what I believed. (Seriously though- who in their right mind needs to eat 6 fried Oreo cookies anyways?)

Nothing else was going to satiate my craving for a fried Oreo, so I bought the first sweet thing I came to as I stomped away- a caramel and peanut coated candy apple. It was only fairly satisfying. So then I bought a cup of fresh-squeezed lemonade to wash down the caramel, all the while thinking about that Oreo. (Man... even now as miserably full as I am, that fried desert still sounds wonderful!) We started to make our way towards the exit of the fair when our curiosity is piqued by a booth selling cheesecake, some dipped in chocolate. A lady tells us this woman's cheesecake has won the prize 3 years in a row now, as we marvel over the sweets, and a man standing in line to purchase his own slice of heaven gushes over the desert he has yet to buy and says it's the best cheesecake you'll ever have, and that he comes back every year to the fair to get some. My sweet tooth is still unsatisfied after not getting that Oreo, and I am an easy sell at this point, so I buy a slice of turtle cheesecake. The man and woman are right- it is pretty amazing. But it is so rich that I cannot even finish one slice even with Lisa helping me eat it. I regret ever buying it as I tossed almost half of it away in a trash can just as we are about to walk out of the fair, and am still fairly annoyed at the unfair fried oreo lady.

Oh well. You know what they say. Life's not a fair.

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Looks & Lulls

Disclaimer: names have been left out to protect the innocent

I was having a conversation with a friend of mine recently. She was asked out on a date by a guy she was not particuarly "into," Or okay- not at ALL into. But the asking out came so out of the blue that this girl did not have time to think things through before she blurted out a "sure, that would be fun," or something along those lines, and regret immediately set in. This friend knew that she was not attracted to the asker-outer, and had about as much in common with the guy as I would with a fishmonger.

The friend is expressing grief to our mutual friend Lana over the situation, as she knows for sure that this guy is not at all her type. "There were all these lulls in the conversation too," she says, "where he just kept standing there, so I kept rambling because I didn't know what else to do!"
"There you go," says Lana matter-of-factly. "Looks and Lulls- those are 2 good reasons to not go out with him."

I thought this was too funny- and too true. One of these hindrances by itself is something one can overcome when initially deciding whether or not to date someone, but the two together are too much. Guess our fishmonger has 2 strikes against him!

Round Here, we don't play our hits

This summer has been quite the season of concert-going for yours truly. Life is dull right now otherwise- I have to have Something to write about I suppose, so I continue to make the sacrifice of time and financial resources in order to have interesting blogging material. Are you appreciating this?

Monday night's latest musical venture was the Goo Goo Dolls/ Counting Crows show at Starwood. This was one of the shows that I was able to get $10 lawn seats for, so even though I would probably not go see either of these bands if they played by themselves or with a lesser-known opening act, together, they were quite the bargain billing. MA, Mason, Maury, and I got cozy on Clifford the Big Red Blanket and enjoyed the warm August evening while we waited for the show to begin. Rhonda and Joe came walking up to where we were and plopped down and announced that they had gotten bumped from their 5th row seat tickets that Joe had scored from a friend in "the biz" (PS- everyone in Nashville is either in The Biz, pretends to be in The Biz, or knows someone who is in the Biz). We start to make fun of them and are pleased at the thought of having 2 more friends to join us on our spot on the blanket. Not so fast. They then inform us that they have actually been upgraded to the 2nd row. Then after our good natured whining about how unfair that is, Joe makes a quick phone call and suddenly he is in posession once again of the 2 5th row seats and lo and behold, MA and I find ourselves standing face to face with the 2 bands for the rest of the evening! We felt bad about leaving the 2 guys in the lawn to fend for themselves, but come on, when presented with front row seats (we worked our way to a spot in the very front), what's a gal to do?

MA and I rocked out right next to the stage with Rhonda and Joe who also made their way up there and we even made it onto the Jumbo Tron several times, each time, receiving text messages from various friends in the crowd with phrases like "u were on the big screen" and "I just saw you." Yeah, we pretty much felt like rockstars ourselves and were the envy of all our friends and aquaintences who saw us up there.

The Goo Goo Dolls opened and I can't say it was an earth-shattering performance. They played all of their hits and did a pretty good job of keeping the crowd involved. My biggest complaint would be letting their creepy dread-locked bassist singing 2 songs. He sang one that said something about "your mom called" in the chorus, to which I shouted above the music to MA, "yeah, your mom called. She said to stop singing." Unfortunately, creepy bassist could not hear me over the awful screeching he was doing. The sound wasn't great for the band, but it was a descent set.

My whole reason for wanting to go though was for the Counting Crows. They have really grown on me the past year or two since I got their greatest hits cd, Films About Ghosts. Unfortunately for the casual fan like me, they didn't play a lot of their well-known hits. For the fanatic fan, they got to hear some unusual musical offerings, but for the rest of us, we left unsatisfied and a little bored at times. There's only so many times Adam Duritz can jump onto the monitors and I get excited. The whole mood onstage for them was mellow, and while Adam's vocals were clear as ever, the short set and the previously mentioned absense of crowd favorite renditions left me leaving Starwood a bit disapointed.

Bummer that I'm going to have to miss the (i Heart) Dave Barnes & Andy Davis show this Saturday in Nashvegas, but I'll be kareoking it up in Bucktown this weekend, and I'm sure I'll have plenty of stories to share.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Real World: BBC Singles Retreat '06

This is a true story ("truuuuueeee storrryyyy") of seven girls picked to stay in a room and share one bathroom for the weekend and have their lives invaded, to find out what happens when people stop being polite and start getting real. The Real World: BBC Singles Retreat '06.

Friday afternoon Mandy, Rhonda, Joe, Mary Anna, and me piled into a car and headed up to Camp Jonathan Creek near Lake Barkley in Kentucky. Traffic was light and we made good time, arriving after dark prior to stopping for a satisfying dinner at a local neighborhood Sonic somewhere between Nashville and our destination. We ladies hauled our bags from the car and into the girls dorm and checked the schedule of events posted on the doors, and of course, the all-important rooming list. I was shocked and appalled to discover that we were arranged in rooms of 7, with one bathroom per 7 people. This was unacceptable, and I lamented this to my fellow passengers who were also quick to discover the bunking situation we had on our hands. There were extra rooms not being used by our group, so the nice people of the facility had conveniently locked those doors for us so that we couldn't get in there to use the extra bathrooms. This was only a slight deterrent, as we simply attempted to pick the locks on the doors with bobby pins and credit cards. I say attempt because our endeavors were not successfull. After getting Aaron, our singles minister, to ask the people there at the facility if it would be possible to unlock the extra rooms, and essentially being told that no, we could not use the extra rooms, we made do with the less than ideal circumstances. Anyone can rough it for 2 days I suppose.

The retreat was a great way to meet a ton of people, and Aaron's talks were very relevant to life right now- well, his second and third talks were- I slept through the first session- I was just so tired that my body needed sleep more than it needed to learn a new spiritual truth I suppose. The team building activities we did split up in groups of 3 were really good, although I am still sore from balancing on that ropes course for 30 minutes! One exercise we were partnered up and took turns being blindfolded and led through the woods on a path while our partner told us which way to go without touching or talking. I was partnered with Chris Choate- a guy I lovingly call my little brother even though he is actually older than I am. Needless to say, I did not exactly trust Chris to lead me with a blindfold on, and I was relieved when the tables were turned and I got to lead him. It was fun walking backwards in front of him and snapping my fingers so that he could hear which direction to go- so much fun in fact that I decided to lead him around in circles in a nearby field while everyone else watched and laughed from a distance!

That afternoon we soaked up the sun while playing volleyball in the shallow pool, and had a cookout that night with the classic cafeteria-style soy hamburgers under the pavillion. There were several of the girls in my small group that went on the retreat so we enlisted Photo Joe to take pictures for us. As it turned out, we were wearing rainbow colored shirts so the pics came out great- I'll post those here whenever MA sends them b/c they were taken on her camera.

After another powerful session of praise & worship and a lesson on discipleship by Aaron, we engaged in a massive catch phrase tournament, and afterwards had a not-so-silent war about the volume level of the TV between those of us playing 90s Trivial Pursuit and those attempting to watch a movie. Can't we all just get along you might ask? No. No we cannot. Not when there are 65 people crammed into a small space and there's nowhere else to go. It was nothing dramatic, but I was definitely ready to be home sleeping in my own bed!

All in all, it was a great weekend away- great fellowship, lots of laugher, and it made me appreciate good food, good mattresses, and my own private bathroom!

Friday, August 18, 2006

dmb, circa 2006

This year I swore it would be my last Dave Matthews concert. I’m going on 10 years of listening to their music, I’ve lost count of how many of his shows I’ve been to, and my interest in them is waning- or so I thought. Not so. While DMB may not be all over the radio anymore (when were they ever?), and are no longer the trendy “it” band that everyone is into (Coldplay has that honor now, I believe) It turns out that Dave Matthews just might be the Kiss, Greatful Dead, or Phish of my generation. We just can’t get enough DMB. He’s so much better live than his cds do him justice, and I know people who have seen way more of his shows than I have, and they continue to travel in droves to see him play the famous venues across America.

Lisa, Lana, Keeli, and myself hopped into Thomas the Avenger on Wednesday night and made our way out to Shady-och and the Starwood Ampitheater in just enough time to miss all of the opener (Pat Green- not mourning the loss on this one) but find a group of Lisa’s college friends in the top center of the hill, and claim our spot before the lights went down, and Dave entertained us for a few hours. Who knows what he said in his typical mumbling in between songs- we were too far back on the lawn to ascertain clearly. We were however, in a great spot to get a contact high from all of the weed being smoked in any direction you turned! There’s something great about the concert culture that allows people from all walks of life to become collective friends for a night as we share a passion for our band of choice. It helps too when there’s that UK connection that makes the bond even stronger! Example- we met a starwood parking attendant in the lot who was from Paducha, KY and a UK fan, one of Lisa’s friends was a UK fan from Mayfield, KY, and a guy from Lousiville that had been a Delt at UK offered us Doritos from his bag while we waited in a long line of traffic to get out of the concert venue!

Dave did not disappoint, doing an even blend of new, unreleased songs, old stuff, and songs from his latest album.

The Setlist:
Don't Drink the Water
Hunger for the Great Light
When the World Ends
The Idea Of You
You Might Die Trying
So Much To Say
Anyone Seen the Bridge?
Too Much
Where Are You Going
Dancing Nancies
Can't Stop
Louisiana Bayou
Ants Marching

And what outing would be complete without a Lana-ism? While attempting to do the sarah Scott W-O-W with her mouth and fingers, Lana accidentally spelled out V-O-V instead. Just a few fingers short. Wow... we only laughed at her a little.

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

A Curse upon you, Comcast!

I bet many of you are getting agitated at looking at last Wednesday's blog- I know- a whole week has gone by, and no new blog from yours truly. Like any good person that always has an excuse for everything, I'm going to point the finger of blame at someone other than myself.

Sure, it's been busy at work, and sure, there have been plenty of little snippets of life that could very well be turned into hilarious diatribes, but it's all Comcast Cable's fault that I can't document these moments for your reading enjoyment. See, here's the deal: I sit at a computer all day at work. 8 hours of staring at a tiny monitor and doing permanent eye damage to myself all to make a buck or two. So then I come at the end of the work day and the last thing I want to do is stare at a computer screen. ha ha of course we all know that is not true, because the Last thing I want to do usually is to go running, but I've been making myself go- or at least being guilt-tripped into going from my friend's husband a few hundred miles away over the phone. Seriously- that happened yesterday. The other thing that qualifies as the last thing I would want to do is going to the grocery store. Saying that the last thing I would want to do when I come home from work is to be on the computer would be like saying that I also would not be up for talking on the phone any more after spending my work day talking to people all day long, and we all know that couldn't be farther from the truth!

Back to the Evil Comcast Empire. They suck. I am tired of fighting with them, but my laptop that I keep up in my room hasn't been connected to the internet lately. There are glimmers of hope when it will work for a mere 5 minutes before losing connection again, but that's not going to cut it. Our desktop which is in the basement IS connected to the internet, no problem, so I know if I call our dear friends at the Monopoly of Cable Headquarters, they will tell me that's not their problem that the wireless router isn't working anymore. I know better though. Because the last time those Comcast Cronies were at the house they let me in on a little secret in the internet empire: as they add more and more customers in the area, the cable signal gets weaker and weaker. They wouldn't promise me that day that the signal would be strong enough for the wireless router to send the internet signal up 2 stories. But I didn't argue with them that day because I checked it and it worked. I was happily online. But now the tides have turned and I have a feeling I know who's to blame for it. George W. Bush. No, of course I am kidding, he is only to blame for the war (Ted Kennedy, anyone?). The real enemy here is the Comcast Cable Corporation. Their weakened signal has prevented me from blogging, researching used cars to buy, and horror of all horrors- checking MySpace!

Let's all take a moment to lament the loss that affects us all. No blogging and no MySpace- what is the world coming to? I'm thinking of reverting to DSL and joining the Slowskys in their internet endeavor. Also, just to make sure you are reading, I intentionally used the word "farther" up above instead of the grammatically correct "further." Just keeping you on your toes. Sorry for the lack of blogging. I miss it as much as you do. We're all in this together!

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

If you can't laugh at yourself

... then laugh at someone else!

It has come to my attention as of late that my life is in this boring funk, and I don't have any humorous anecdotes of which to turn into funny blogs. Is it that my life has become one dull humdrum routine? Quite the contrary- life never seems to slow down, and my friends and I are constantly planning unique outings that make me glad to be in my 20s- drive in movies, after work happy hours, and concerts galore. But somehow these events come and go without me finding much to drag out into a verbose story of hilarity. So it's high time we laugh again here at the Divadomain, and if we can't laugh at my stupidity and circumstances, then we'll laugh at someone else's!

Anecdote #1... my aunt is hard of hearing, so lately she has gotten into the habit of watching movies with the closed captioning on, and just reading the subtitles instead of trying to strain to hear the dialogue. Last week my cousin had had all she could take, and she walked into the room where her mom (my aunt) was watching the movie. "Mom," she said, "why are you listening to that movie in Spanish?!" Apparently in turning on the english subtitles, my aunt had also accidentally set the dialogue to play in Espanol, and because she wasn't paying attention to the sound, she was hearing the movie in one language, and reading it in another!

Anecdote #2...I received an email from a good friend of mine this morning that was sent to her by a mutual good friend (the names of the guilty are being left out to protect their stupidity) "I just wanted to give you the word of the day," our friend wrote. "The word of the day is 'schmuck.' A 'schmuck' is someone who thinks that one of their best friend's birthdays is on August 22 instead of August 2."

Apparently, I got blamed for this friend missing the birthday because I didn't call to remind her. What's even funnier is that on the 2nd, I said to my friend, Has so-and-so called you today, because I forgot to call and remind her that it was your birthday. Apparently so-and-so did Not remember, and now we are all having a good chuckle at her expense. Not so much a guffaw or a ha ha, but a good chuckle nonetheless (hey, you take what you can get when you've got the summer blahs and nothing else is blogworthy enough to document!)

Who's story will wind up here next? No one is safe...

Friday, August 04, 2006

Friday morning Funnies/ Calling All Shopaholics

Got a minute? Take a quick scan through this article- Hound dog mauls Elvis's teddy bear. It's worth a little ha ha through a little something I like to call situational irony.

Also, calling all Tennesseans- today marks the beginning of the tax-free weekend so get those pocketbooks ready to shop, shop, shop and buy stuff for no reason, simply just so you can "stick it to the man" and not have to pay tax on your purchases. A word of caution though: not everything is tax exempt. To help you out I've put together a succinct sample of a few items you may want to take advantage of, and others you might want to avoid since they will be taxable.

Tax exempt items you might want to grab while you're out this weekend:
*Aerobic clothing, Blackboard Chalk, Clerical Vestments, Corsets, Cowboy Boots, Earmuffs, Highlighters, Pajamas, Socks, Thongs, & Walking shoes (as opposed to shoes that you Wouldn't walk in??!)

Steer clear of the following- you WILL be taxed on these items:
*Belt Buckles, Briefcases, Clay, Cosmetics (BOOOOO!!), Swim Fins, Safety Goggles, Handbags (again, BOOOO!), Maps, Paint, Printer Supplies, Respirators, Shoulder Pads, Ski Boots, Tool belts, Welders' Gloves

For a complete list of taxable/exempt items click here. Who wants to go shopping this weekend??!! Have a Fantabulous Friday. Much love to you all.

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

too bad it Wasn't Bryan Adams!

I'm sure many of you will get an eyefull on MA's blog about this, since she is the real Ryan Adams fan here, but tonight's show was just too crappy to let just one blog have the honor of trashing it. Maury, MA, and I went to the Ryman tonight to see Ryan Adams (yes, that's Ryan and not Bryan- not the same guy who sings Summer of 69- remember that- it's important later!). I sort of went as a last minute replacement for Mason who had to be out of town on business since I am a lover of music and like to find new artists. Ryan Adams isn't new by any stretch of the imagination, but he always seems to be flying under the radar so I decided it was time to check him out. For the past few weeks I have been listening to some of his stuff, trying to prepare myself for the concert. Tonight it was go-time.

First, the 3 of us met up after work and went to Blackstone Brewery for dinner. 2 out of our 3 meals were bad, and when I say bad, I do not mean that the food was just so-so, I mean that MA's pizza was inedible until she doctored it up with extra tomatoes, mozerella, and olive oil, and the only thing roasted in my roasted tomato soup was the campbells soup can on the stove before they poured it into a bowl and sat it on my table. No worries though- we were pumped to see Ryan Adams.

You may not know his stuff. If you like country music, you will recognize him as the songwriter for Tim McGraw's latest single, "Stars Go Blue," or you might recall one of Ryan's songs being on the Elizabethtown soundtrack- neither of which he played tonight. In fact, most everything he played was unrecognizable because there was so much ear-splitting gyuitar distortion going on that it made it difficult to appreciate any of the true moments of greatness in his music. As was apparent by the audience sing-along participation, the accoustic guitar-driven "Oh My Sweet Carolina" was his best song by far. As you'll see from MA's blog, Ryan pretty much has 3 distinct sounds- the moody, folky accoustic stuff, the americana country, and the heavy metal drug-induced rock.

I would not wish to presume that our rockstar was under the influence of any foreign substance, but seriously, I don't see how he could have put on white platform shoes if he were in his right mind, nor argue with audience members (who eventually got kicked out for a smart-alec request that Ryan play "Summer of 69!"), or go off in unintelligle conversations with himself about waffle house, yachts, or his nether regions smelling like an onion factory. It grosses me out just thinking about it. The singer throwing out the audience member was by far more entertaining than most anything he played, and I think everyone there was just waiting for the drama to unfold, since Ryan allegedly kicked someone out of the Ryman the last time he played there too!

I wish I could have finished this blog the other night after the show when I was so fired up about having sat (and stood) through such a disapointing show, but the internet was acting up. How in the heck does this guy get away with a crap set list like that and still sell out the Ryman? My friends tell me that this show was not a good representation of Ryan's best work, but my thought is, if he doesn't think any better of his other music, then why should I pay to take a chance and see him again? Overall, I'll stay away from all the heavy rock stuff and continue to listen to his accoustic and alt-country stuff, but I would never go see that pretentious Bryan-Adams-wannabe again!