Brother Dennis-isms

Y'all have to know how much I loved my pastor at Midway Baptist Church in Florida.  He was a big teddy bear of a man, a great storyteller, had the best sense of humor, was ultra-conservative, and was an unapologetic preacher of the Word of God.  He simply tells it like it is... and then embellishes a little bit to make a great story!

I have a journal where I keep track of quotes I like, and I went through my journal last night where I keep all my sermon notes and found these jewels that I then transferred to my quotes journal.  They are so funny and simple and profound that I thought I'd share some of them with y'all.

• All sunshine and no rain makes a desert.
• You have to do away with stinkin' thinkin'.
• Stop worrying, or worrying will stop you.
• There's no U-haul pulled behind a hearse.
• Stop being in a hurry when God's not.
• If you want a king, be a queen.
• You can't have all jelly beans and no green beans.
• Sometimes it's the bland leading the bland.
• Don't give to get... unless you're giving to get to give!
• You can't be a leader without being a follower first.
• Never confuse your net worth with your self worth.
• I always sing that prison music.  You know, where you're always behind a few bars huntin' for a key!
• Money talks.  It says "Bye!"
• You can't unscramble an egg.
• Anything with no head is dead, and 2 heads is a freak show (referring to wives submitting to their husbands)! 
• There are no illegitimate children, only illegitimate parents.