Tuesday, January 25, 2005

the Black Lung

So I’m still trying to get over this black lung disease. It’s really not the black lung, but we don’t know what else to call it. I think Em had it first, but then whenever it got passed on to Rhonda she had these pathetic little double-coughs that were reminiscent of the Derek Zoolander "cough, cough, I think I have the black lung, pop." So it then became known as the Black Lung in our apartment. Well it’s obnoxious is what it is. No temperature (my Mom checked. She also made me chicken noodle soup. Thanks for that.), no sinus congestion, just a tickling cough and I have developed some minor congestion in my chest, but I feel completely fine otherwise. I know this is way more than any of you care to know, but whatever. I need to vent.

We’re going on week 2 of the Black Lung and I am at my wits’ end. Last night I woke myself up multiple times coughing, so even though I went to bed super-early and slept in this morning I still feel like I got no sleep. I’ve been taking this leftover prescription expectorant/decongestant that I had and I made the mistake the first day I took it of taking an entire tablet. Big mistake. This stuff has some serious adverse reactions I found out quickly, a few of which are, but not limited to, being jittery, loopy, and pass-out exhausted.

Is it bad that I have all kinds of leftover prescription drugs? I never finish them. Never. And I know all the biologists out there would say that it’s my fault that the spread of disease is continuing to occur because the little bugger viruses are smart and develop immunity to the drugs. They continue morph into more powerful strands of the same virus all because we don’t finish our medicine.

Mom found a bottle of Bacon Bits in our pantry at home a few months ago that was 6 years old. Six Years! And what did they morph into? Nothing. Bacon Bits are indestructible. No way am I putting any of those into my stomach ever again. I’ll take my chances with the Black Lung virus.


jillymae said...

yes, indeedy, it is scary that bacon bits can survive that long! what "bits" are those things made of anyway?
before you resort to drastic measures, one of my buddies said her doctor recommended that new OTC mecicine, Mucinex, for "black lung". she tried it and it really works!!!

Tadd said...

Maybe "bacon" bits are really bits of tid. you know, tid bits.

Amanda said...

interesting... I wonder what the history behind the idiom "tid-bits" is?

MamaB said...

6 year old bacon bits---now who will ever want to come to our house for dinner again---thanks PAL!!!! A restful weekend with nothing planned might make that nasty black lung thing go away!!! love, Mom

Amanda said...

A weekend with nothing planned? Are you trying to give me a heart attack to go along with the black lung? You know I'm OCD and have to have everything planned out in advance and can't sit still with any free time I have. But it's a nice thought.

Anonymous said...

Yeah... I suffered from the Bacon Bit situation. That was no fun. I was the one who ate 7 years old bacon bits.